As I talk to my daughters and other young women in my community, I hear them say that they took certain actions so that they would not give the impression of being the stereotypical "angry black woman". I'm here to say "don't buy the hype". You have every reason to be angry and you can, if the mood strikes you, act like "an angry black woman". Watch and see...the world will go on.
Did it ever occur to you that you have every right to be angry? Lower pay, race and gender bias, restricted social opportunities and negative stereotyping...all of these things play a part in feeding your so called "anger". But, I firmly believe that your demonstrated strength and intelligence is often misunderstood as "anger".
I remember when I was a part of the work force, serving at the executive level. Often I would make a valid point or raise a cogent question or make a reasonable objection only to be overlooked, unheard, and just "tolerated" until some male, normally white, made the same point, or raised the same question or made the same objection. Not only was he heard and his issue acknowledged, but more often than not he was applauded for his knowledge and insight. When the bonuses were passed out, I could always expect the lowest sum, while other less deserving counterparts were granted "big bucks".
Did you ask if I was "angry"? Hell yes, I was livid, but powerless to do anything but survive from day to day. I used the time to teach others what I had learned about the corporate game and used every opportunity to bring them to the "table" so that they could see the game first hand. We talked, discussed strategies, sifted through alternatives and found ways to pull others along the winding path up the corporate ladder with us. We dried each others tears, sang one another's praises and prayed together, providing some sanity in insane situations.
I lived that life for forty years and hid my anger, focused on my family, and focused on the day I could retire. Retirement-that's my revenge, along with doing whatever I can to prop other sisters up while they fight that same struggle.
Sisters, be an angry Black women, if the situation calls for it and don't beat yourself up for it. As Scarlett O'Hara said "tomorrow is another day". Nourish yourself and get stronger, but allow yourself to fail, to hurt, to worry, and to be unsure. Don't buy the myth of the "superwoman" everyone expects you to be. Demand respect and accept nothing less. Challenge anyone who fails to accord you the deference you are entitled to expect, from your man, from your family and from those in the workplace.
Listen to Maya Angelou and remember who you are- educated, intelligent, beautiful and empowered.
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.
Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.
Related Articles:
The Black Woman in America
An Upside to the Angry Black Woman Stereotype
Why is Hollywood So Afraid of the Black Woman
Angry Black Women Hear Us Roar Grrrrrrrr
0 comments:
Post a Comment