I guess you could call me an angry black woman. I
sometimes feel so bad that the media talks negatively about me all the time and
even our First Lady Michelle Obama has been referred to in those same terms. It
seems that few bother to understand why the angry black woman evolved.
People often refer to Dr. King’s “Dream” and assume
a collective reality. The dictionary defines a dream as a succession of images,
thoughts, or emotions occurring during sleep; a dream is a goal or an aim; a
dream is a wild fantasy or something of unreal beauty; a dream is to conceive
something remotely. I noticed that the word dream is listed somewhere between
dreadful and dreary. Yes, even though I’m a black woman, I have hopes and
dreams, just like everyone else. If your dreams have been shattered, you might
be angry too. For some of us, struggling each day, life is not a dream, it’s a
nightmare.
Why should black women who haven’t enjoyed all the
fruits of the civil rights revolution, who don’t have Ivy League educations or high
paying jobs or comfortable homes, be quietly seething inside? It's from the
experiences of everyday life, from lessons learned in the run of the mill human
encounters, and from the struggles of family member and friends. It comes from learning that one can never
take kindness for granted, from resentment at being judged at every turn based
on one's complexion and sex, but not on character or accomplishments, from
learning what it means never to be able to relax, from never knowing where the
next insult or slight will come from, and from never being able to drop your guard.
The angry black woman understands the anger and pain inflicted by experiences
that do not quickly go away. We understand the price of bearing an incredible burden of
living life constantly under a microscope and being constantly reduced to third
class citizenship and still be expected to operate with a smile on your face
regardless of facing first one thing then another.
When you should feel pride or feel privilege, some
incident comes along...right in your domain, to tell you that you are not a
member...that you don't belong there...”How dare you put yourself on the same
plane with me”...”How dare you challenge me”...”How dare you think you have power
and authority”. You find yourself out of the informal communications network,
of not being “in on” things, and even missing out on a mentor who is supportive of
your career. You spend inordinate amount of time making people "comfortable"
with you and walking softly or facing the prospect of being driven out. You live with the
frustration and facing the magnitude and pervasiveness of the problem everyday. 
Opal Palmer Adisa's essay "Rocking in the Sunlight:
Stress and the Black Woman" asks this question:
"Did
you ever wonder why so many sisters look so angry? Why we walk like we've got bricks in our bags
and will slash and curse you at the drop of a hat? It's because stress is hemmed into our
dresses, pressed into our hair, mixed into our perfume and painted on our
fingers. Stress from the deferred
dreams, the dreams not voiced; stress from broken promises and blatant lies;
stresses from always being at the bottom, from never being thought beautiful,
from always being taken for granted, taken advantage of, stress from being a
black woman in white America."
The angry black woman has seen the results of
passivity in the face of abuse. They have gone in the opposite direction,
declaring “Never will I tolerate unfair treatment from anybody”. Based on our
collective experiences, I don’t understand why people can’t see that our behavior
is thought to be necessary for our survival.
Join me in Part 2 of the Angry Black Woman Speaks as
I explore what can be done to deal with the causes of our anger and what
strategies might be employed to deal with the irritations and frustrations that
inspire our rage.
3 comments:
Powerful Sis ! Our pain is warranted though negatively documented by the incessant images of the neck-rolling, tooth sucking, eye-bugging, hand-waving, hip-grabbing, finger-snapping persona that America uses to characterize my mother, my sisterfriend, my grandmother, and myself. We are portrayed as over bearing, overwhelming, loud mouthed, and angry- as though we’ve nothing to lament. This, from a society bent upon shrinking our horizons, and imprisoning our dreams in an airtight jar of systematically indoctrinated self-hatred and assimilation.
I’ve written a piece or two myself on this topic. My favorite is a simple spoken word piece:
Open:
(BLACK STAGE, SINGLE SPOTLIGHT)
Me: Angry Black Woman?..........YOU DAMN RIGHT.
(SILENCE)
(SPOTLIGHT OUT)
End
Thank you SilverLady for opening up the dialogue. Thank you for revealing the emperor’s nudity- somebody has got to say something about the obvious. Somebody’s got to say it aloud. I can’t wait for the next installment!
You.Speak.Truth.
-SpiritChild
Very nice and insightful article that needs to be read and explored by many
First of all Thank you Black Woman Celeste aka SilverLady for taking an active stand to address one of many issues facing Black Women. I look forward to your suggested strategies in the very near future to implement with self as well as to share with others.
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